( it was easier when she told herself she didn't care, when she said she wouldn't regret what awaited her, when she thought that she would burn the city down and herself with it no matter how much she wanted to live.

it was easier. it was. )

Then I should spare you the truth and tell you a wonderful story where everyone lives at the end instead. ( she loosens her grip on fearne's hand to tug away, wanting to put distance between-- this, them, this. ) I should give you a happily ever after, and assure you that everything is fine.

( but




she can't. she can't. she already made a promise to herself that she wouldn't lie to midnight, tell him a fairytale in the book about herself that she said she'd write for him. fearne, just as much as him, deserves her honesty.

for asking. for wanting to know.

even if it scares her. even if it never stops being terrifying, admitting to this. )

I can do that, ( she says quietly, voice quivering slightly, ) if you want that instead, Fearne.

( or she can tell her the truth. )